Pak Jokes

Raabri was worried whether or not Laloo upon his death made it to heaven, so she decided to try to contact his spirit by having a seance.

Sure enough, after the usual mumbo-jumbo of calling to the spirits, Laloo’s voice was heard answering, “Hello Raabri, this is meeee…”

“Lalooji,” she answered. I just have to know if you’re happy there in the after life. What’s it like there?”

Mr .Laloo Prasad Yadav was sitting with his Ministers examining mail.

Suddenly Mr. Laloo cried out, “Look at this letter! It is addressed to the stupidest man in Bihar”.

His ministers tried to calm him by saying, “How dare a man address such a letter to you?”

Mr. Laloo replied sadly, “This does not bother me, but why did the postman deliver it at the right address?”

Football show

(18 votes, average: 4.5 out of 5)

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Laloo to his P.A.: Itne khiladi kyun football ko laat maar rahe hai?

P.A.: Goal kar ne k liye.

Laloo: Susra, ball toh pahle se hi gol hai aur kitna gol karenge!

When USA completed 1 years of occupation over Iraq, US President George Bush wanted a special postage stamp issued for Iraq, with his picture on it.

He so instructed the Head of United States Postal Service, stressing that postage stamp should be of international quality.

The stamps were duly released of the stamp, Bush began hearing complaints that the stamp was not sticking properly, and he becomes furious.
He called Paul Bremer and ordered him to investigate the matter.

Paul Bremer checked the matter out at several post offices in Iraq, and then reported on the problem to Bush.

He said: “Sir, the stamp is really of international quality. The problem is, Iraqi citizens are spitting on the wrong side!“

A man walks into a scientist’s lab looking to buy a new brain. He asks the scientist how much the brains cost.

The scientist says, “Well first we have a normal human brain, it costs $1000, next we have a scientist’s brain, it costs $5000, and then we come to a politician’s, it costs $10,000.”

“How come the politician’s brain costs so much?”, asks the man.

The scientist replies, “Because it’s never been used.”

Air Force One crashed in the middle of rural America. Panic stricken the Secret Service mobilized and descended on the farm in force. When they got there, the wreckage was clear. The aircraft was totally destroyed with only a burned hulk left smoldering in a tree line that bordered a farm.

Secret Service descended upon the smoking hulk but could find no remains of the crew or the President’s staff. To their amazement, a lone farmer was plowing a field not too far away as if nothing at all happened. They hurried over to surround the man’s tractor.

“Sir,” the senior Secret Service agent asked, panting and out of breath.

“Did you see this terrible accident happen?”

“Yep. Sure did.” The man muttered unconcernedly.

“Do you realize that is the President of the United States airplane?”

“Yep.”

“Were there any survivors?” the agent gasped.

“Nope. They all kilt straight out.” The farmer sighed cutting off his tractor motor. “I done buried them all myself. Took most of the morning.”

“The President of the United States is dead?” The agent gulped in disbelief.

“Well,” the farmer sighed, obviously wanting to get back to his work. “He kept a-saying he wasn’t… but you know what a liar he is.”

Conversation between George W. and his National Security Advisor, Condolezza Rice

George: Condi! Nice to see you. What’s happening?

Condi: Sir, I have the report here about the new leader of China.

George: Great. Lay it on me.

Condi: Hu is the new leader of China.

George: That’s what I want to know.

President Clinton is out jogging, and he encounters a man with some puppies. Clinton asks the man what kind of puppies they are, and the man responds, “They’re Democrat puppies, Mr. President.”

Clinton thinks that is so great that the next day he brings the first lady to see these puppies for herself. He asks the man to tell Hillary what kind of puppies they are, and the man responds, “They’re Republican puppies.”

The president looks puzzled and says, “Yesterday, you told me they were Democrat puppies.” The man smiles and says, “Yesterday, they were. But today, they have their eyes open!”

Don’t even try to mess with me…

3 chhipkliyan diwar pe chal rahi thein.

Ek ne gana shuru kiya

Jaisey hi gana band kiya baki ke do gir padein!

Bolo kyon?

Stupid eis liye

Baki dono ne tali bajai…